It is interesting the things that get your attention and start you thinking. Today someone asked me to fix the stapler, help with a copy machine issue and fix a candler holder. None of these are big deals but in years past, I would have been the one asking for two out of three of those. No one would have assumed I knew how to fix anything (other than the copy machine). Not even me.
My attitude toward myself has changed greatly in the last 6 years. I am more confident and confidence breeds more confidence. For the first time in my life, I'm the high man on the totem pole at my job. I've always worked with people older than me who have years more experience. Now I'm the one with more experience. What I'm finding is I know way more about many things than I thought I did.
All day long this journal page has been in the back of my head. I wasn't sure what I'd do but I knew I had to create something about the way I was feeling. I've never tried to paint a mountain and as I did I thought, I sure wish I'd looked at some pictures and knew more about shadows... but then I decided the act of creating this page was the goal. The expressing how I felt was way more important than what my mountains really looked like.
Part of me wanted to put,"I think I can, I think I can" all over the page. I could just see that little train going up and down that mountain. The mountains were enough... no way I could draw a train.
Believing in myself is amazing. People who know me now can't believe I haven't always been like this. For most of my life, I didn't believe I could... or maybe it was that I was just too scared to try so I didn't know I could.